HiKaRiNoNaMiDa's Xanga

Wednesday, December 20, 2006

Wed, 20 Dec 2006 23:43:28 GMT

Ah!! Christmas!!! xDD Time of giving...

First year in my life that I am so bankrupted...*sigh*

Need to save money and buuuuuuuuuuuuuuy for peeps!!

Wednesday, December 06, 2006

Wed, 06 Dec 2006 21:22:28 GMT

And again, I sit here, wondering about the darkness...
Thinking nothing but death...
How many times have this occurred?
More than anything I can count…

And again, I sit here, tears running down my cheeks…
Thinking nothing but death…
How much longer must I live?
All I ever do is cry in the darkness!

And again, I sit here, tears soaking these same pages.
How much longer must I suffer?
Why can’t I just disappear?
But in the end, no one would bother to care!

I don’t care anymore…
No one ever gives a care to my feelings.
So why don’t you shut the fuck up bitch and quit complaining?
Because you are NOT the one feeling this pain!

That’s it.
Guess I won’t be eating at home anymore.
It’s not like anyone actually gives a damn.
They probably want me to die anyways.

That’s right, I have no heart.
But ever thought of it this way?
You never showed me the meaning of love.
I have no heart so that I sit in the darkness and sob.

For the past 7 years, I have endured nothing but pain.
What happiness?
All a load of crap!

How stupid people are when they suicide?
I admire them…
To be able to take your life, to have the courage to do so…
I admire them so…to just run away!

All is meaningless if I don’t get away.
That’s right, I have lost my heart…
Light, what light?
I never seen no fucking light.
I been in darkness all this time…
And I think its time for me to go…
If only my tears would stop…!!!

Yes, how pathetic I am...
Fortunately, I lost my interest to care.
I have already lost my faith in everything...
So whatever...
I shall wait for my death...
Maybe I should just jump out the next time I cross the road.
I don't care about the pain anymore...
Anything is better than this!

Thursday, November 23, 2006

Thu, 23 Nov 2006 21:56:33 GMT

Woah, its almost been a month!! How's everyone's Thanksgiving?? Been good? Had turkey? [Chicken? Dock? to the Chinese peeps xD]

Me just came home from Yadira house....REAL nice turkey there xD I'm full...well...I'm kind hungry again >.<

I'm beginning to make my X-mas list! Lol.

1. sports bag [which i wanna put clothes in when i go to the ski trip]

2. more GBs for compie! [i dont wanna delete all my thingies..]

And thats it for now xDD <to be added on at a later time> Right....hahaz.

HAPPY TURKEY DAY!!!

Thursday, October 26, 2006

Thu, 26 Oct 2006 22:27:15 GMT

>.<

I have been forced....to get myspace and facebook.

So here r da links xDD

me at facebook

me at myspace

OMFG! Internet!!

Mon, 16 Oct 2006 20:51:10 GMT

I FINALLY HAVE MY INTERNET BACK!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Hey, ya gotta give me propz yo. I been FULLY w/o internet for the last 12 days!!! Yo, thats the LONGEST time for me w/o internet.

Though, the thing I'm using a VERY unstable. Got Belkin router and then got a D-Link UBS Adapter.

MOST HATED INTERNET PROVIDERS
1. AOL
2. VERZION DSL [getting near the level of AOL soon]

Then...some dudes from Earthlink called me just today....I swore....I'm hating internet providers right now...HATING!! >.>

Anywayz...I HAVE MY INTERNET *hugs my browser* I LOVE YA!!! Now...I need to go d/l all the anime/manga shit I missed for the past 2 weeks....argh....T.T

I'm 17!!!

Wed, 04 Oct 2006 21:16:21 GMT

Yo, I turned 17!!!! YAY!!!!

Time to list my gifts!! xDDD Lol, though not all peeps gave me my presents ^^;; I'll list what I got in order...

Cannon Powershot S630
Gamecube
Fire Emblem: Path of Radiance
Pounchy
Harvest Moon
Organizer
Frame
5 balloons
PC Camera
Pokemon Blue Rescue Team
Swatch watch
Nintendo DS Lite

Muahahahah! Yo, my 17th bday is so much BETTER than 16th since I cried for like an entire day for my 16th bday.

I love ya peeps!!! THANKIES FOR ALL THE GIFTS!!! *blows kisses*

PS: Gonna eat cake when my mom comes back home...which should be any minute now. I'll get piccies of my cake and post it up later. Ciao for now! -^^-

1.5 dayz left til 17 bday!!! xDDD

Mon, 02 Oct 2006 20:32:35 GMT

Muahahahaha. Hello!! Me gonna turn 17 on the 4th! xDDD

I got presents already!!! -^^- Let me list what I got today when I went hanging out with Mikki, Khaing, and Ozzy.

Gamecube & Path of Radiance - Ozzy [happy -^^-]
Pouch - Khaing [muahaa, luv ya xDDD]
Harvest Moon - Mikki [I'm gonna farm! I'll do my best down in the mines! ^^;;]

I freaking had to get my bro the freaking Pokemon game for Gamecube. Gale of Darkness or something. Dude, after I get the DS, I'll be so BROKE! >.<

PS: I'll be moving this coming Saturday/Sunday. To Fresh Meadow...so yeah. Busy busy busy. Did I mention, I'm also out of money? >.>

I CANNOT WAIT FOR WEDNESDAY!! xDDD

Gonna go to the mall after 7th period to go get my DS, wanna come with??

4 dayzzzz til 17th bday!! xDD

Fri, 29 Sep 2006 23:03:25 GMT

So....Kimmee, Andy, and Peter threw me this bday cake eating/karaoke thingy after school. It was...FUN!!! Oh and we were playing Monopoly!! xDDD

When me and Kimmee were going to Carvel to get my ice cream cake, we saw Mr.Tilitz [no comment] snapping down tree branches. I was like O.o but he said, "It's unhealthy for trees to have branches so low...I past this one everyday so I thought I would take care of it." And again...I went O.o I mean...the way he walked was funny. Me and Kimmee went untentionally stalking him until he passed the 7th train stop in Jacking Heights xDDDD

My piccies of da ice cream cake -^^-

Me gonna go karaoke on Monday in Flushing!! Khaing, come with to hear me sing!!! Ya can just buy me my present in Flushing, okies??

PS: Muahaha, I'll be getting 3 DS games for my bday xDD or at least I hope!! so happy!!

Saturday, September 23, 2006

Sat, 23 Sep 2006 21:19:03 GMT

count down til bday 10 days! Muahahaha xDD

Um, I decided to what to get for myself for my damned 17th birthday. If my parents aint celebrating it. I sure am.

I'm getting myself a DS Lite!

Er..but I only have about 75% of the fund...anyone willing to get me a giftcard of some sort?? >.<

If not...I guess I'll just either wait for a sale or til the price come down to $100. *sigh* I'm so sad...I REALLY need a job.

Wait, then I also need a game...Damn! This sux! xDD

Thursday, September 21, 2006

Thu, 21 Sep 2006 19:37:05 GMT

count down to bday: 12 days!! xDDD

Bday approaching. The last bday...Oh yeah. On October 4th, 2005, I made a record. Its the day when I cried the most since birth. Sweet 16 huh? My ass. Well, this year, I doubt it'll get any better. My 16th bday was already fuked up...so I won't expect much for my 17th bday. From my parents anyways since they were the ones that made me cry.

So yeah, less depression stuff...Oh yes!! My compie was going crazy the last 3 days but for some reasons...it's back to normal, w/o interent of course, but...normal cuz there's no more of the BSOD [i got it right....right? >.<] anymore! xDD And frankly, there is no worm in my compie -^^-

PS: WOAH!!! Me wanna c Tarzan on Broadway...!!! T.T How much's the ticket?? I wanna go. I wanna go!!!